I couldn’t think of a title for this one. However, these words kept returning, thanks to some gracious feedback I received describing my work in general. “A woman breaking out of convention”, “a union of birds eye view and tunnel vision”, and “simplified complexity.” All as concise as they are resonant.
I was feeling down, and leaned on creating for some self-care. Disappointed in myself for some minor thing, but the kind of thing that grows within me if I can’t figure out what to do about it. Seeing clearly the things I want to be different but unsure *how* to be different. Yet. Or maybe the answer is rather obvious but there is some baffling barrier preventing me from doing the very simple thing. Wrestling again to accept where I am, to accept that growth takes time, and patience, and practice. Creating was a reprieve from that heavy feeling. Creating like this lets me pursue that desire for something different even when I have no idea what to look for or how I am going to get there. But I did get here. Maybe at some level an acceptance that we only know, only see, a small window in any scene. The rest is usually unclear.
Desire for something different
I began with this image of an abandoned building I noticed on my way to a recent session.
Next, I searched my images for a portrait that stood out to me. It was the movement in the skirt that caught my attention. A woman in a flowing dress walking away may seem like redundant imagery, but there can be a lot of nuance to that one idea. Still, I wanted to go beyond that somehow. Or come at it a little differently than I have before.
After combining these two images, I experimented with a few options in various digital apps. I found inspiration in this one, how my image was transformed into something more dream-like. A suspension of reality, or a suspension of a stuck mindset, perhaps.
With gratitude
I really love this one. I love how I feel a little lighter after spending time on it. I love how reflecting on it reminds me of those beautiful words from a friend. I love how I keep using images of this yellow dress, and how that reminds me of how thankful I am for those experiences—and those relationships. I love how it reminds me of people whom I draw inspiration from or feel supported by in this quest to keep pressing in, and how dearly I hold them in my heart.
