“Whatever appears in our nighttime dreams, whatever appears in our waking life … is all there is … it’s up to us whether we work with it or try to run away.” -Pema Chodron
.jpg)
Feeling edgy recently, too much to do. Not enough sleep, spread too thin. From this place, I don’t act in ways I want to. I am irritable, less patient. And I know that nothing makes me more volatile than suppressing my own feelings of inadequacy/shame. These things always spill into places they have no business being when not cared for.
Art making is a beautiful outlet for this. The emotions we may experience when we start facing these feelings, difficult experiences, or parts of ourselves we’d rather not acknowledge, can be overwhelming at times. Art provides a gentle, nurturing approach.
“We have to be willing to listen to our wisdom instead of following our robotic, habitual patterns. We have to be willing to invite … feelings to stay longer so that we can get to know them to their depth.” -Pema Chodron
So I stay with what I’m feeling and work with whatever images I have available, the ones that resonate with me in that moment. I hold no expectations for an end result, I don’t try to make anything in particular. My intention here is just exploring. This time I was stuck between two different edits. The muted image is more familiar but I loved the bold colors, it’s something different.
.jpg)
.jpg)
It occurred to me to run these through Insight. I was curious to see what I would receive back from the same image edited in different ways. I was curious how I would feel about what I saw in these AI generated images, and what that could contribute to my understanding.
.png)
.png)
I really like the arms in one from the muted set. I saw an expression of discomfort in one’s self sort of, an awkwardness, uncertainty. This was so relatable. I also liked the bold red, how it was a little messy, not contained. This was inspiring to me.
I thought, maybe try mixing them together next. Discomfort in one’s self mixed with bold action.
.jpg)
When I consider these images together, I notice the progression, specifically the distance to the door. Could the door represent bold action, or boldness in general? I am very close, almost right there. I have come so far. And I think, it’s ok to feel doubt, maybe even necessary sometimes. Self doubt and self confidence exist simultaneously within us, it’s not simply one or the other.
“Be simple, open, and straightforward about what matters to you and what you are working on. The true reward … comes when we are courageous enough to step out from behind the mask and expose our brilliant, flawed, utterly human selves. No covering up, no apologizing – just taking responsibility for it all.” -Baron Baptiste
